Sinning against another is not merely defined as causing actual hurt, harm, loss, damage, embarrassment, pain, waste of time, disrespect, etc. Sinning, when it comes to your fellow Jew, includes falling short of ALL OF ONE'S POTENTIAL in bestowing kindness, charity, encouragement, mercy, justice, honor, comfort, helpfulness, concern, rescue, making other Jews happy, pursuing peace, etc. - actively and constantly - with all one's might - to all other Jews.

Falling short of our true and full potential is central to Heavenly prosecution against us (Heaven forbid)...so much so that any shortchanging of any and every Jew of WHAT WE COULD HAVE GIVEN ON BEHALF OF THE OTHER'S GOOD IS CALLED, IN HEAVEN, "THEFT." Stealing is not only when A takes something from B. Stealing includes when A withholds something good from B that A could have bestowed to B!

The Torah fully and uncompromisingly prohibits ever harming any person. Readiness for marriage requires, and even takes for granted, that one be functionally, consistently and reliably no cause of harm or neglect to another person. Although you may find this idealistic, the Torah standards never drop to suit anyone's convenience, especially when another person is effected negatively by you.

Proverbs (24:16) teaches, "The righteous falls seven times and gets back up." Being righteous does not mean you never make mistakes. What is the difference between the righteous and the evil person? When the righteous person falls, he stands right back up - even if he slips many times. The wicked person is content to stay down in the mud. If a person ever makes a mistake, at least feel badly about, rectify it and move on - down the road of the righteous, saying, "Well, there's one more thing I know not to do!" As time goes on, you make fewer and fewer mistakes and every month you can discern yourself to be on a slightly higher level than the previous month. He or she works on faults to constantly reduce human flaws and to achieve higher and higher levels as a person.

At the very least, one's attitude and basic behavior patterns must not cause or condone pain, shortchange, embarrassment, disrespect, disappointment, loss or any kind of harm to or irresponsibility against another person.

If you basically please and benefit other people, feel happy to give to other people, feel horrified whenever you have occasion to accidentally and inadvertently hurt another person, are rapid and "on target" to make good and to do tshuva shlaima (full repentance - to be described in chapter five) and make good on all wrong that you may do, if as time goes on your mistakes grow more few-and-far-between, and if you basically feel and exhibit practical concern and respect for other people, then you are in the ready-to-marry-ballpark.

The closer a person is to you, the more vulnerable, dependent and helpless the person can be; and the commensurately higher the level of obligation that the Torah places on you to be compassionate, helpful, giving, pleasing, responsive, responsible and good to the closer person. There is no one closer to you or in more need of you than your spouse and children. The third chapter of Pirkei Avos tell us that the more you are pleasing to other people, the more you are pleasing to G-d. There is no one more pleased than your pleased spouse and secure children. There is no one more displeased with you than your displeased spouse, no one more damaged by you than a spouse or children.