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Prepared by Rabbi N. Slifkin
of Kollel Iyun Hadaf, Yerushalayim
Rosh Kollel: Rabbi Mordecai Kornfeld


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Nedarim 81

NEDARIM 81 - dedicated by Mrs. G. Turkel (Rabbi Kornfeld's grandmother), an exceptional woman who accepted all of Hashem's Gezeiros with love and who loved and respected the study of Torah. Tehei Nafshah Tzerurah bi'Tzror ha'Chaim.

1) WHICH CHILDREN ARE LIKELY TO BECOME CHACHAMIM?

(a) Answer: R. Yosi holds that not laundering is worse than not bathing.
1. (Shmuel): Dirt that accumulates on an uncombed head leads to blindness; dirt that accumulates on unwashed clothing leads to insanity; dirt that accumulates when one does not bathe leads to boils.
(b) (Sages of Eretz Yisrael): Beware of dirt (the 3 types mentioned above); be careful to learn in a group; be zealous to teach poor children, for they are likely to become great in Torah.
1. "Water (i.e. Torah) will drip mi'Dalyo (from its well)" - this may be read, 'mi'Dalim', from poor people.
(c) Question: Why don't Chachamim usually descend from Chachamim?
(d) Answer #1 (Rav Yosef): So they should not say that Torah is an inheritance to them.
(e) Answer #2 (Rav Sheshes Brei d'Rav Idi): So they should not become haughty over the congregation.
(f) Answer #3 (Mar Zutra): (Chachamim are punished that their children are not Chachamim) because they put themselves over the congregation.
(g) Answer #4 (Rav Ashi): Because they call people 'donkeys'.
(h) Answer #5 (Ravina): Because they do not bless before learning Torah.
1. (Rav Yehudah): "Who is the Chacham that knows this (why Yisrael were exiled)?" - Chachamim, prophets and the angels were unable to explain it, until Hash-m explained:
(i) Question: "Because they abandoned my Torah" - this is the same as "They did not listen to my voice" - and this is the same as "They did not go in my way"!
(j) Answer (Rav Yehudah): "They did not go in my way" means that they did not (appreciate Torah enough to properly) bless before learning Torah.
2) NOT BATHING
(a) Isi Bar Yehudah did not come to R. Yosi's Yeshivah for 3 days. R. Yosi's son Vardimus asked him why.
1. Isi: Because I do not understand his reasoning.
2. Vardimus: What don't you understand - perhaps I can explain it.
3. Isi: That laundry of the city dwellers overrides the lives of others - what verse says this?!
4. Vardimus: "The outskirts (of the cities of the Leviyim) will be for their animals, their possessions, and all Chayasam."
5. Question: What does it mean, "Chayasam"?
i. Suggestion: If it means, their Chayos (wild animals) - these are included in "All their animals"!
ii. Suggestion: Rather, it means "their Chayusa" (livelihood).
iii. Rejection: This is obvious!
6. Answer: Rather, it refers to their laundering, so they should not suffer from the dirt.
3) VOWS THAT AFFECT RELATIONS BETWEEN THEM
(a) (Mishnah - R. Yosi): These are not vows of affliction.
(b) Question: Does R. Yosi hold that they may be annulled, for they affect their relations?
(c) Answer #1 (Beraisa - R. Yosi): These are not vows of affliction, but they are matters which affect their relations.
1. Rejection: Perhaps R. Yosi himself does not hold that way, he merely addressed Chachamim according to their opinion.
i. R. Yosi: I hold, they are not even matters which affect their relations - you say they are vows of affliction - you should admit, they are not really vows of affliction, they are at most matters which affect their relations.
(d) Answer #2 (Rav Ada Bar Ahavah): They may be annulled.
(e) Answer #3 (Rav Huna): They may not be annulled.
81b---------------------------------------81b

1. Since her husband is used to her, no damage will result if she does not bathe.
(f) A Beraisa supports Rav Ada Bar Ahavah.
(g) (Beraisa): The husband may annul vows of affliction, whether they affect him or others;
(h) Vows not of affliction - the husband may only annul what affects him, not what affects others.
1. 'Fruits are forbidden to me' - he may annul this;
2. 'What I make should be forbidden to my father or brother, or to your father or brother; I will not put straw in front of your animal, or water in front of your cattle' - he cannot annul these.
3. 'I will not color my eyes, or Ekfos (apply mudpacks to my face; some say - comb my hair) or have relations - he may annul, for these affect his relations with her;
4. 'I will not make your bed, or mix your drink, or wash you face, hands and feet' - he need not annul these (because she is obligated to do these, her vow is invalid);
i. R. Gamliel says, he must annul (mid'Rabanan, lest she become habituated to vowing, and come to transgress) "He will not negate his word".
ii. Also - "He will not negate his word" teaches that a Chacham cannot permit his own vow.
(i) (Summation, how this supports Rav Ada Bar Ahavah): R. Yosi is the Tana who says that 'I will not color my eyes, or Ekfos' are vows that affect relations between them - and the Beraisa says, he may annul them!
(j) (Beraisa): 'I will not have relations' - he may annul, for these affect his relations with her.
(k) Question: What was the exact text of the vow?
1. Suggestion: If 'you may not enjoy relations with me' - since she is obligated to have relations with him, the vow is void, why must he annul it?!
(l) Answer: Rather, 'Enjoyment of relations with you is forbidden to me', as Rav Kahana.
1. (Rav Kahana): If she says 'You may not enjoy relations with me' - he can force her to have relations;
2. 'Enjoyment of relations with you is forbidden to me' - he must annul this, for she can forbid relations on herself; therefore, he may not have relations with her, since this causes her to transgress.
(m) Question: Who taught: "He will not annul; his word" - things which are permitted, but people treat them as forbidden, you may not tell them that they may be lenient, to abolish the custom?
1. Also - "He will not negate his word" teaches that a Chacham cannot permit his own vow.
(n) Answer: R. Gamliel taught this.
(o) Question (Rava): According to Chachamim: a vow not to have relations - is this a vow of affliction, or a vow that affects relations between them?
(p) Answer (Rav Nachman - Mishnah): 'I will not have relations with any Yisrael' - he annuls the part of the vow relevant to him, and she is forbidden to have relations with any other Yisrael (even after she is widowed or divorced).
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