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15) DO WE APPORTION WINE TO A WOMAN?

(a) (R. Elazar): We do not apportion wine to a woman.

1. One cannot ask from the verse "That give my ... Ushkuyai (and drinks)" - rather, uSHKuyai refers to things that a woman miSHtoKekes (desires), namely, ornaments.

(b) (Rav Yehudah): We do not apportion wine to a woman - "Chanah got up after her eating ... and *his* drinking" - it does not say, after her drinking.
(c) Question: According to this, we should say, *her* eating and not his eating?!
(d) Answer: No - since the verse deals with her, "his drinking" is unnatural and is expounded; ("her eating" is natural, and is not expounded).
(e) Question (Beraisa): If she is accustomed, we give her (wine).
(f) Answer #1: The case of a woman who is used to wine is different, as we see from Rav Chinena.

1. (Rav Chinena): If she is accustomed, we give her one cup; if not, we give her 2.
2. Question: How can this be?
3. Answer (Abaye): Explain thusly: If she is accustomed to 2 cups when with her husband, we give her 1 cup when not with him; if she is accustomed to 1 cup when with her husband, we do not give her at all when alone.

(g) Answer #2: A woman who is accustomed receives wine for cooking.

1. (R. Avahu): Chachamim apportioned 2 Sa'os of wine for Nakdimon Ben Guryon's daughter-in-law to use in cooking each week.

i. She told them, 'So you should apportion to your daughters!'
ii. She was a widow that fell to Yibum (out of anger that they didn't apportion more, she cursed them that their daughters should also fall to Yibum) - they did not answer Amen.

(h) (Beraisa): One cup is good for a woman; 2, disgracing; 3, she will verbally demand relations; 4, she will seek to have relations with a donkey in the market (in public), without shame.

1. (Rava): This only applies when her husband is not with her - when her husband is with her, there is no concern.
2. Question: But Chanah was with her husband (and we learned from her)!
3. Answer: The case of one lodging away from home is different.

i. (Rav Huna): A boarder is forbidden to have relations - "They returned to their city ... and Elkanah had relations with his wife" - but not before.

(i) Abaye's widow, Chomah, came before Rava, and requested that he apportion wine for her.

1. Rava: I know, Abaye did not drink wine!
2. Chomah: I swear, he did! He would give me in vessels like this ...

i. As she was demonstrating, her arm was revealed. Light fell in the Beis Din; Rava desired relations, and went to his wife, Rav Chisda's daughter.
ii. Rava's wife: Who was in Beis Din (that caused your desire)?
iii. Rava: Chomah.
iv. Rava's wife took a strap and chased Chomah out of the city. "You have already killed 3 men (a woman that has been widowed 2 or 3 times is established to cause the death of her husbands, and is forbidden to remarry), and you seek to kill more!

(j) The wife of Rav Yosef Bar Rava asked Rav Nechemyah Bar Rav Yosef to apportion wine for her; he did so.

1. Rav Nechemyah: I know, women of her city drink wine.

(k) The widow of Rav Yosef Brei d'Rav Menashiya asked Rav Yosef to apportion wine for her; he did so. She requested that he apportion silk for her.

1. Rav Yosef: Why do you need silk?
2. The widow: For you and your colleagues (that I should not be disgraced in your eyes).

(a) (Mishnah): He gives her a bed and mat ...
(b) Question: Why does she need a mattress (and mat - Tosfos omits these words from the text)?
(c) Answer (Rav Papa): This is in a place where the bedropes are uncovered - it hurts to sleep on such a bed without a mattress.
(d) (Beraisa): We do not give her a pillow and blanket; R. Nosan says, says, we give her.
(e) Question: What is the case?

1. If it is normal for her family - why would the first Tana say she does not get it?
2. If it is not normal for her family - why would R, Nosan say she gets it?

(f) Answer: It is normal for his family, but not for hers.

1. The first Tana says, he can tell her - 'When I go, I will take them; when I return, I will bring them!'
2. R. Nosan says, she can counter, 'Sometimes, you will return right before Shabbos, and will not be able to bring them - you will take mine, and I will sleep on the floor!'

(g) (Mishnah): He gives her a kerchief ...

(h) Question (Rav Papa): The Tana strips her (only gives her clothing once a year), but gives her shoes (every festival)?!
(i) Answer (Abaye): The Tana is in a place of mountains, where 3 pairs of shoes are needed each year.

1. The Tana counsels, it is good to give her during the festival, to make her happy.

(j) (Mishnah): Clothes worth 50 Zuz ...
(k) (Abaye): These are simple Zuzi (7/8 copper, worth only 1/8 of Zuzi of Tzur).

1. We know this since the Mishnah deals with the poorest of people - such a person would not have 50 Zuz of pure silver!

(l) (Beraisa): Excess food belongs to the husband; extra remnants of clothing belong to the wife.
(m) Question: Why does she need them?
(n) Answer (Rachbah): To wear when she is Nidah, so she will not be despised to her husband (by wearing the same clothing when Tehorah as when Nidah).
(o) (Abaye): Extra remnants of clothing of a widow belong to the heirs.

1. In this case, there is no concern if she is despised.

(a) Question: What does the Mishnah mean, 'She eats with him Shabbos night'?
(b) Answer #1 (Rav Nachman): Literally, she eats with him.
(c) Answer #2 (Rav Ashi): They have relations.

1. If so, why does the Mishnah say she eats with him?
2. Answer: This is just a nice language.

i. "She ate ... and said, I did not sin."

(d) Question (Beraisa - R. Shimon Ben Gamliel): She eats with him on Shabbos night and Shabbos (day).

1. We understand the opinion that this literally means eating.
2. The opinion that it means relations - do they have relations (by day)?

i. (Rav Huna): Yisrael are holy, and do not have relations by day!

(e) Answer: As Rava taught - in a dark house, it is permitted.
(f) (Mishnah): If she was nursing ...
(g) (R. Ula Rabah): Even though Chachamim said, a man need not feed his children when they are minors - but he must feed very small children.

1. Question: Until what age?
2. Answer: Until 6 years.

i. (Rav Asi): A 6-year-old may rely on the Eiruv of his mother.

(h) Question: How did R. Ula derive his law from our Mishnah?
(i) Answer: It says, a nursing woman is given more food.

1. Suggestion: This is because her baby eats with her!
2. Rejection: No - rather, she is as a sick person that requires more food.
3. Objection: If so, the Mishnah should say, 'If she is sick ...' - why did it teach the case of a nursing wife?
4. Answer: Perhaps it comes to teach that nursing women are assumed to require more food!

i. R. Yehoshua Ben Levi: We apportion wine to a nursing mother, since this is good for the milk.

18) PRIVILEGES A MAN HAS IN HIS WIFE

(a) (Mishnah): Objects a wife finds, and her earnings belong to her husband; what she inherits - he receives the produce of it in her lifetime;
(b) Payments of one who embarrassed or wounded her are hers; R. Yehudah Ben Beseira says, for damage to a covered part of the body, she receives 2/3 of the payment, he gets 1/3; for damage to an exposed part of the body, she receives 1/3, he gets 2/3.

1. He receives his share immediately; her share is used to buy land, and he receives the fruits.

(c) (Gemara) Question: A previous Mishnah already taught this!
(d) (Mishnah): A father receives ... found objects and earnings of his daughter ... a husband has all these privileges, and also receives the produce of her property!
(e) Answer: We need to teach the dispute of R. Yehudah Ben Beseira and Chachamim on payments for embarrassment and injury.
(f) A Chacham recited a Beraisa in front of Rava: If a married woman finds an object, she keeps it; R. Akiva says, it belongs to her husband.