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1) THE NUPTIAL BLESSINGS

(a) (Rav Yehudah): The blessings are:

1. "... that everything he created for his honor".
2. "... who forms man".
3. "... that formed man in his image ... Blessed are you, Hashem, that forms man."
4. "Rejoice and make rejoice ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who gladdens Tziyon with her children."
5. "Be happy, loving friends ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who gladdens Chasan and Kalah."
6. "Blessed are you, ... who created happiness ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who makes the Chasan rejoice with the Kalah."

(b) Levi came to Rebbi's house at the wedding of R. Shimon, Rebbi's son; he blessed 5 of these blessings.
(c) Rav Asi came to Rav Ashi's house at the wedding of his son Mar; he blessed all 6 blessings.
(d) Suggestion: Levi omitted the 2nd blessing because he holds that there was one formation of man; Rav Asi said the 2nd blessing, because he holds that there were 2 formations of man.
(e) Rejection: Both agree that there was only 1 formation; Rav Asi makes 2 blessings on the formation of man, since that was Hashem's intent; Levi says that we follow the actual formation, which was only one.

1. Question (Rav Yehudah): It says "Hashem created man in his image"; it later says, "He created them male and female"!
2. Answer: He intended to create them as 2; in deed, he created one.

(a) Rav Ashi came to Rav Kahana's house. The 1st day he made all the blessings.
(b) After the 1st day, if there were new faces, he made all the blessings; if not, he only blessed "that joy is in His dwelling", and "that created joy ...".
(c) From 7 days after the wedding until 30, whether the guests were invited because of the wedding or not, he blessed "that joy is in his dwelling".
(d) After 30 days, if the guests were invited because of the wedding, he blessed "that joy is in his dwelling"; if not, not.
(e) Question: For how long does one say this, when the guests were invited because of the wedding?
(f) Answer (Rav Papi): For 12 months.
(g) Question: From when does one start saying the blessing?
(h) Answer (Rav Papa): From when he soaks the barley to make beer. (Some explain: from when he soaks barley, as a sign that the couple should be fruitful.)
(i) Question: But Rav Papa arranged a match for his son, and blessed from the time of the engagement!
(j) Answer: Rav Papa is an exception - he had all needs of the Chupah ready.
(k) Ravina arranged a match for his son into the family of Rav Chaviva, and blessed from the time of the engagement.

1. He did so because he was sure they would not retract; in the end, they retracted.

(l) Rav Tachlifa went to Bavel, and blessed 6 long blessings (i.e. he lengthened the first two and closed them with Blessed are you, Hashem, ... ); the law is not like this.
(m) Rav Chaviva went to a meal celebrating a Bris. He blessed "that joy is in his dwelling"; the law is not like this, because people are disturbed that the baby is in pain.

(a) (Rav): The Chasan is counted among (the 10) needed to say Birkas Chasanim; mourners are not counted among the number needed to say Birkas Avelim.
(b) Question (Beraisa): Chasanim and mourners are counted towards the required number.
(c) Answer: Rav is a Tana; he may argue on a Beraisa.
(d) (R. Yochanan): Chasanim are counted towards the required number, but not mourners.
(e) Question (Beraisa): Chasanim and mourners are counted towards the required number.

(f) Answer: The Beraisa deals with blessing over a meal; R. Yochanan's law applies to the line of consolers.
(g) Question: But R. Yochanan said that we bless Birkas Chasanim with 10, and Chasanim count towards the 10; we bless Birkas Avelim with 10, and mourners do not count towards the 10.

1. Is there really a blessing in the line of consolers?

(h) Retraction: R. Yochanan's law applies to the street (where we give the mourner his first meal).
(i) Question: But R. Yochanan said that we bless Birkas Chasanim with 10 all 7 days, and Chasanim count towards the 10; we bless Birkas Avelim with 10 all 7 days, and mourners do not count towards the 10.

1. Do we really bless in the street all 7 days?

(j) Answer: Yes, when new consolers come.

(a) R. Chiya Bar Aba taught the children of Reish Lakish; one of them died. He did not go the 1st day to console him, but did go the 2nd day. He told Yehudah Bar Nachmani to say words of consolation.
(b) Yehudah: "From the anger of his children" - when the parents sin, Hashem is angry at the children, and they die in childhood.
(c) Some say that an older child died. Yehudah: "Hashem will not rejoice on his youths ... "

1. (Rav Chanan Bar Rav): " ... His hand is still stretched" - all know why a bride enters the Chupah, but one who fouls his mouth by saying something obscene, even if 70 good years had been decreed for him, they are changed for evil.

(d) Question: This is not consolation, these words provoke pain!
(e) Answer: Thusly he was saying: you (Reish Lakish) are worthy to bear the punishments fitting to come on the generation.
(f) R. Chiya Bar Aba: Speak in the praise of Hash-m.
(g) Yehudah: "The great G-d ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who revives the dead."
(h) R. Chiya Bar Aba: Speak to the mourners.
(i) Yehudah: Our afflicted brothers, put your hearts to investigate this ... many drank (the cup of afflictions), many will drink; the drinking of the later ones will resemble the drinking of the first ones ... Blessed is He who consoles mourners.

1. (Abaye): One should say 'many drank', but not 'many will drink'; one should say 'the drinking of the first ones', but not 'the drinking of the later ones'.
2. (Reish Lakish): A person should not open to the Satan (say that he is fitting to be punished).
3. (Rav Yosef): He learns this from "We were as Sodom"; the reply was, "Hear the word of Hash-m, officers of Sodom".

(j) R. Chiya Bar Aba: Speak in praise of the consolers.
(k) Yehudah: Our brothers, bestowers of Chesed, children of bestowers of Chesed ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who pays reward.
(l) R. Chiya Bar Aba: Speak on behalf of all of Yisrael.
(m) Yehudah: Master of the worlds, redeem and save your nation Yisrael from pestilence, sword, ... Blessed are you, Hashem, who stops the plague.

(a) (Ula): It was enacted that the mourner drink 10 cups of wine: 3 before the meal, to open his intestines (to help him to eat); 3 during the meal, to digest the food; and 4 after the meal, corresponding to the 4 blessings after a meal.
(b) They added 4 more cups, corresponding to community servants, leaders of the city (both of these used to assist in burials), the Beis ha'Mikdash, and R. Gamliel.
(c) This led to drunkenness, so they returned to the original status quo (10 cups).

1. Question: Why was a blessing enacted corresponding to R. Gamliel?
2. Answer (Beraisa): It used to be, the expense of burial pained the mourners more than the loss (because all used to buy expensive shrouds). Mourners would abandon the deceased and flee! R. Gamliel buried his deceased in simple linen shrouds, and everyone followed his example.
3. Rav Papa: Today the custom is to make shrouds of hemp, which cost only a Zuz.